Grrr!
Dr Eggman, why did you call us here?
All will be revealed in due time, my friends.
We're still waiting on one more arrival.
But I have a noon shift at Meh Burger.
If I'm late, I'll never get that raise to minimum wage.
[all] Yeah, yeah.
Fine, fine, we'll get started.
In this room I've gathered a rogues' gallery
of the most vile, nefarious, repugnalevolent evildoers...
Repugnalevolent? Is that a word?
It didn't need to be until we had this much evil in one room.
Anyway, you're here because we all have something in common.
A love of fine cheeses?
Well, yes, but besides that we all share a mutual enemy.
Sonic the Hedgehog and his rodent friends.
We must stop them before they destroy us all.
Thanks for helping me build my Bjornvaalden bookcase
from that foreign build-your-own furniture store.
- That's it? - They fit a lot in one box.
Whoa! Ugh!
Mm-mm! These are some fine cheeses.
But where are the crackers?
I wanted everything to be perfect.
Keep calm, everyone.
I'll send Orbot out to the store. Oh! Crisis averted.
[male voice] So this is why you called me here.
[gasps]
Shadow the Hedgehog!
Hey, everybody, look. Shadow's here.
I knew those embossed invitations would impress.
- Who's he? - Only the second most popular character
in the whole canon.
Let me get you a chair, Mr Shadow.
Ugh! Ohh!
I prefer to stand.
Of course. You rogue, you! I like standing too.
Everyone, on your feet.
[all groan]
Where were we? I'll just start at the beginning.
There are no words, just pictures.
Just like the novel I'm writing.
Good plot, but the characters are all over the place.
And so, with my superior leadership
and your blind loyalty,
we'll finally be rid of those meddling muskrats.
Hey, how come you're calling the shots?
I'm the best villain here.
I spent more time in the pen than all of you combined.
That just proves you're the best at getting caught.
What we need is an educated fellow.
An organised leader
who knows how to keep hotheads like you under control
and can maintain parliamentary procedure.
Objection. Anyone can learn parliamentary procedure.
Point of order.
"Objection" is courtroom terminology,
- not parliamentary. - Sustained.
As anyone with even a cursory knowledge
of the sci-fi classic "Battleforce Galaxian" knows,
our leader should be a young, inexperienced teenager
who's destined for glory.
Lest you want to repeat Admiral Glork's mistakes.
You're losing focus!
Remember, I'm the one who called this meeting.
And great job, by the way.
Who picked out this stemware? It's barely worth stealing.
[all arguing]
Come on, Eggman, get it together.
I know what this group needs.
Time for some team-building exercises.
Fall backward into your buddy's arms and let them catch you.
This is called a "trust fall".
Ohh!
My fault. Should have given you a heads-up. That was on me.
You never know what's going to happen on the battlefield,
so it's important to think on your feet.
This is a game I used to play
with my old improv troupe, the Gigglesnorts.
It's called "Zip-Zap-Zop".
We pass around an imaginary ball,
saying "Zip", "Zap" or "Zop" as we go.
I'll start. Zip.
Zap.
Uh, that's to you, Shadow.
You want to zap that one over to Dave?
Maybe zap that bad boy back to me, huh? No?
- Pfft. - He "pffted" it.
We'll count that. Great job.
Silence, fool.
[all gasp]
I've suffered your presence long enough.
No, no, don't go. We're not done bonding yet.
We were gonna roast wieners and play flashlight tag.
We're making history here.
This collection of villains has never been assembled before.
I see no villains.
Just some fools whose only ability is wasting time.
- That's something, isn't it? - No. Not really.
[groans]
How do we tell the difference between Side A and Side C?
Side A should have one more L-bracket.
- You mean T-bracket, right? - Uh...
Tails, so help me, if you've been confusing.
L-brackets and T-brackets this whole time...
Who used all the D-screws?
All I have left are J-knobs, which are worthless.
And has anyone seen Back Panel G?
Uh, I think I found it.
Uggh! Ohh!
Great. Now we have to go back and exchange the whole thing.
Come on, let's pack it up.
No fair! Sonic always beats me.
With Shadow on our squad, we had a real chance.
He's so cool and edgy.
If standing in the corner while everyone has fun makes you cool,
I must have been the coolest guy at my junior prom.
And we all know that's not true, so I say nuts to Shadow.
He's not a team player like the rest of us.
With Dr Eggman's superior leadership skills
and our blind loyalty,
we can do whatever we set our evil minds to.
Aww! Was that a callback to my earlier speech?
You guys...
All right, team, gather round. Here's the plan.
We've got a brand-new Bjornvaalden.
Let's just build it here.
Then when we mess up we can get yet another one.
Great idea, Sonic.
That's why I'm the leader.
Now let's dominate this cheap piece of furniture...
to the best of our limited ability.
We're out of parts and instructions.
I think we're done.
Great work, team.
Did somebody call for a dramatic entrance?
Tails, get an aerial survey. We'll take him out from here.
Whoa.
Bogey on my tail. Gonna try and shake him.
He stole my purse! My baby... pictures.
An ambush!
Knuckles, that one's all you.
Your team is stretched a bit thin, you periwinkle pipsqueak.
I can take you one on one any day, Egghead.
Who said anything about one on one?
You've got to be kidding me.
It's working. The plan's actually working!
Over here, you oversized can opener!
No!
Call off your goons or I'll smash you into next week.
I'm busy next week.
I mean, I could reschedule, but I've...
Pathetic.
Even with all this help you still couldn't defeat Sonic.
It's happening! Shadow has joined Team Eggman!
I'm geeking out here!
Need any help, Shadow?
OK, you got this one.
Ooh, that just missed you. Allow me to...
OK, just tag me in when you're ready.
Out of the way, you buffoon.
Excuse me. I'm with Shadow.
Hey, we worked all day on that.
Your shoddy craftsmanship brings shame on all hedgehog-kind.
And for that, you shall perish.
We did it! Sonic was defeated by Team Eggman.
- Victory selfie! - Gah!
You fool! I had him just where I wanted him.
Sorry. That one's on me, Shadow. Forgot to turn off the flash.
Pic looks great, if it's any consolation.
Enough!
How can a guy destroy his foes with dolts like you around?
We'll fight again soon, Sonic, but next time... on my terms.
[all] Yeah!
Great job, everybody.
We may not be able to build a bookcase
but we sure as heck can clobber some creeps.
Speaking of which...
Now, guys, let's not point fingers
about who's to blame for this little scuffle.
Ohh! Ow! Hey!
What a swell adventure.
I sure hope there's more next year.
Just think of all the hundreds more stories to be told
using the same eight characters and four locations.
The possibilities are limitless.
To be on the safe side, we could start an internet petition.
Subtitling: Eclair Media